Ellie Wilde, Ph.D.

I approach therapy from a relational, attachment perspective, and incorporate humanistic, culturally-responsive, and feminist lenses into my work. In therapy, my goal is to help you identify and dismantle barriers to connection, and explore how your identities, culture, relationships, ancestors, and personal history impact you. Together, we can uncover what is hidden, empower you to pursue your dreams and values, and build relationships with others who can understand you and support you on your path. I believe in helping you access the strengths and resources you already have in yourself and your community, and building awareness, skills, and connections that can help you achieve your goals. I am honored to join you for a part of your journey, and tailor my approach to your needs as a client.

I am attentive to the dynamics of power and privilege for myself and my clients both in and out of the therapy room. I see you as the expert on your own experience, and can offer you my perspective and help you discover strategies that help you on your path. Together, we can find out what you want to shed, and what you want to bring into the next phase of your life. We will go at a pace that works best for you.

Depending on your needs and preferences, I can bring the following modalities into our work together: Internal Family Systems and Emotion Focused Therapy to help you better connect with all parts of yourself; Dynamic Psychotherapy to help you enjoy more satisfaction in relationships with others; Somatic (body-focused) strategies to help you release trauma and stress and tune into your body’s natural wisdom, to access increased freedom to expand and grow. I use principles and skills from Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Mindful Self-Compassion to help you tolerate difficult emotions. I also incorporate elements of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy as needed to help you clarify your values and make choices that feel meaningful, fulfilling, and true to you.

I am always learning and am inspired by the work of writers and therapists Edith Eger, Victor Frankl, and Resmaa Menakem, activists Tarana Burke and Tricia Hersey, mindful self-compassion teachers Tara Brach and Kristin Neff, and researchers Judith Herman and Bessel Van der Kolk. I will recommend relevant books to you excitedly if you tell me you enjoy reading.

I believe that for most of us, relationships are the greatest source of pain, pleasure, meaning, and growth in our lives. Research shows that the quality of our relationships is the biggest predictor of our well-being. I approach therapy from this perspective. As a therapist, I focus on helping you understand, accept, and change yourself in ways you choose, while always attending to the central role of your connections with others. I have a deep commitment to culturally responsive care and approach therapy with awareness of the identities you and I both hold, and how these identities contribute to different experiences of privilege and marginalization in the world.

Social justice work is at the heart of my practice. While I’m still learning every day, this is what I’ve seen so far – Therapy happens in the context of our society, which systemically oppresses those with marginalized identities. Lack of opportunity, violence, and other stressors bring us to a point of burn out or break down, and then we are blamed for struggling or labeled “mentally ill.” I believe most mental health concerns are a natural response to our toxic environment, which surrounds us with harmful messages that keep us stuck in suffering and self-blame (making us easier to exploit and control!) Most of us have additionally had to develop beliefs and narratives that helped us get through challenging personal situations in the past, but now get in our way. In therapy, I seek to provide a safe space in which you can uncover the narratives and beliefs that no longer serve you, and replace them with ones which feel truer, and make more room for you to grow and thrive.

I believe that most of our suffering arises from the pain of disconnection. In the words of Louis Cozalino, “It is not the survival of the fittest but the survival of the nurtured.” Our culture deprives us of relationships with each other, with our bodies, and with the natural world – we are social animals shamed for needing each other. Many of us also grow up hearing messages glorifying the “rational” brain, and shaming us for having bodies and emotions – which leaves us cut off from our best ways of knowing what we feel and need. Our bodies and emotions are smart, designed to provide us with wisdom and direction. In therapy, I can help you find ways to befriend your body, hear its wisdom, and release the stress it holds so that you can experience a greater sense of empowerment, joy, and connection in your life.

While dismantling systems of oppression and undoing the damage they’ve done cannot be accomplished entirely in a therapist’s office, I see therapy as an opportunity to create a ripple effect. When we tune into our inner wisdom and increase acceptance and compassion for ourselves, we gain the power to bring a more grounded, loving presence to others, helping them do the same, and making the world a better place one ripple at a time.

Seattle Pacific University, Seattle, WA
Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology (2023)

Reed College, Portland, OR
B.A. in Psychology (2015)

Before starting graduate school, I worked as a staff writer for The Gottman Institute, where I learned a lot about relationships. I also worked with trauma-exposed and neurodivergent youth as a counselor at Camp Ramapo for Children in Rhinebeck, NY, and at Ryther Child Center in Seattle, WA. These experiences gave me a developmental and relational perspective on mental health, and ignited my passion for working with individuals, couples, and families.

In graduate school, I was lucky to access a broad range of training experiences. I have worked with teens in a private teletherapy practice, and with a diverse population of college students at University of Puget Sound, University of Washington, and Central Washington University. I experienced the world of primary care at Swedish Hospital, and had the opportunity to work with kids and teens on the autism spectrum at Seattle Children’s Hospital, including providing gender-affirming care through the Gender Clinic. In addition to working with individuals, couples, and families, I have deeply enjoyed collaborating with colleagues to facilitate groups, including: parent trainings for families with kids who engage in challenging behaviors (Incredible Years Program), DBT parent training for teens who engage in self-harm, a group for young adults with depression, for adults with sleep problems, for college students learning self-compassion, for kids and families struggling with OCD, and most recently a process group helping members develop deeper, more authentic, more satisfying relationships with others.

Clinical Training

• DBT Intensive Seminar: 6-month training by UW’s Center for Suicide Prevention & Seattle Children’s 
• Prolonged Exposure for PTSD Training by Medical University of South Carolina & VA
• Interpersonal Process & Social Rhythm Therapy for Bipolar Disorder (IPSRT) Training funded by NIMH
• Advanced Master Program on the Treatment of Trauma by NICABM 
• Exposure, Relaxation, & Rescripting Therapy for Trauma Related Nightmares (ERRT-M) Training by the VA with Treatment Creator, Joanne Davis, PhD
• The Compassion in Therapy Summit by Naropa University, UCSD Center for Mindfulness, and the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion
• Complex Trauma Webinar Series 1: Psychological and Spiritual Interventions
• Anti-Racism Therapy: Moving Beyond Cultural Competence by Redwood Psychological Association
• Introduction to Internal Family Systems by IFS Institute
• Keep Your Cup Full: Self Care is Essential to Trauma-Informed Advocacy by National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
• Trauma Super Conference 2021 by Conscious Life and The Optimum Health Clinic